Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Damn Bloggers...

Howdy!!!!  So after about 2987456 tries of coming up with different names for my blog I finally came to this one... Not my original choice.  My original choice was Knick Knack Patty Whack (based on my favorite joke of all time!!!) But nooooo someone chose that already!  You wouldn't believe the names I typed it!  All taken! 

Anywhoo, I'll start this first blog off with who I am.  What I'm about.  Why I chose to create a blog, and why you're gonna wanna visit me often!  :) 

This shall be the only serious post you will see from me.  I don't do serious very well.  I mean, don't get me wrong, there's a lot of serious shit in my life.  A LOT!  Which, is why I choose to laugh. 

Okay.. so about me.

1.  I'm a wife.
2.  I'm a mom to two awesome girls!  Oldest almost 24, Youngest almost 20. (why do people say that shit??  Why don't they just say 23 and 19!!??  It's like calling your 3 yr old 36 months.  Bullshit!) ;)
3.  I love to laugh!
4.  No really, I love, love, love to laugh!
5.  More importantly, I love to make others laugh!  It's seriously a life mission for me.  If I make you laugh then I'm content. Freak, I know. 
6.  I am fiercely loyal to those I love.  Fiercely.  I will cut you if you hurt them.
7.  I am the oldest sister, to four siblings, a daughter to two parents (who've been married for 45 years), an Aunt (which is FOR REAL one of my most favorite things in the world!!! I ♥ those kids like I love my own.. all (almost) 14 of them (2 on the way!) 
8.  I am an awesome friend. You wouldn't believe the shit I'm taking to my grave!  ;)
9.  I do too much for others, and never enough for myself. 
10. I am the biggest Indianapolis Colt's fan on planet earth.  Just sayin'
11. I hate the Patriots. (love you Carmen!) 
12. I'm a Pepsiaholic.  I have the Pepsi tattoo to prove it.
13. I'm the Universes biggest Bruce Springsteen fan. TRUTH.
14. I work in the medical field, though the Doc I work for is retiring soon and then I think I'm either going to join the circus (in reality I hate circuses and their animal abuse) or I'm going to be a carny. (Not like Wilson though.. she got issues dude!)
15.  I'm a music FREAK.  In fact, my brain is a human jukebox and I can find a song in every single thing that is said, and sadly, my brain does just that.
16.  I hate Country music. (Jesus how many fucking times can your dog run off with your beer!?)
17.  Might shoulda mentioned this at the top I reckon, but I cuss. A lot. I absolutely disagree with "foul language is a lack of intelligence, or vocabulary"  I call it "colorful" (If you're easily offended by language, probably not the blog for you)
18.  I am 100% real. 
19.  I am going to be 44 this year, so yes, I'm at the gray hair- piss your pants when you cough, sneeze, laugh or just cause -what the hell did I come into this room for, stage of my life. Awesome right!?
20.  I have a four legged son.  I ♥ that boy more than the English language allows me to express.  He's mean, he's aggressive (not to me), and he's 98% evil.  He has my heart!  I'm a huge pet advocate too, so if you suck at being a pet parent, move along now, ya hear!

So.. there you have it.  Now, it is your mission.. if you should choose it.. to come back often.  I can promise you'll smile, and if you're half normal you'll laugh.  If you're totally whacked like I am, you'll laugh till you piss your pants. (It also helps if you've given birth, in that case a mere giggle could do it!)

Peace out Girlscout! :)

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